The Vespa and I

Two guys in their seventies are riding across the country on Piaggio MP3s. I rode with them on the first leg of their journey on June 13. You can follow their progress here. That’s me pictured above in the pink helmet.

Scooter blogger Crystal Waters wrote about me yesterday.

If you’re going to the San Francisco Pride Parade this Sunday, I’ll be riding with Dykes on Bikes again this year. Watch for the pack of Scooter Girls near the beginning of the group! (For those of you who are confused, Dykes on Bikes is open to all women regardless of orientation.)

Weird Gadget of the Week: Food Lover Temporary Tattoos

$7.95 from those geniuses at Archie McPhee.

Weird Gadget of the Week: Voodoo Doll Toothpick Holder

I spotted this item at Sur La Table over the weekend, but it’s not listed on their website. It’s made by Fred, available in black or white (one for the bride, one for the groom?) from many online retailers. Suggested retail is $9.

Poached Salmon in the Dishwasher

I’d try this IF I HAD A DISHWASHER.

Dammit, WordPress is not letting me embed the video. Point your browser here: http://www.tomscott.com/salmon/

(via tomscott.com and b3ta)

Review: Trader Giotto’s Alfredo Sauce

Alfredo sauce is so easy to make from scratch — it’s just heavy cream, butter and parmesan cheese (and in my case, lots and lots of pepper and garlic) — that one wonders why anyone would put it in a jar and sell it. We all know the answer to that question: we’re usually too lazy to make it ourselves.

Trader Joe’s version of this simple recipe has waaaay more than three ingredients (what the hell is xanthan gum?) but you sure can’t tell by tasting it. I know it’s supposed to be kind of bland, but this stuff is beyond bland. It doesn’t really taste like anything, but despite being incredibly runny it has a creamy mouth feel. I’ve had better alfredo in frozen dinners (Marie Callender’s is my favorite.)

I made this sauce my own by heating it on the stove top to make it thicker, and by adding salt, pressed garlic and freshly ground black pepper.

If you want make your own from scratch, here’s the Williams-Sonoma recipe. (Nutmeg? Where did that come from?)

Welcome to My Kitchen

I’ve crewed on sailboats that have bigger kitchens than this, yet I still manage to cook here.

My old apartment had turquoise appliances (just like on “Ugly Betty”), so I started collecting turquoise kitchen goodies, both vintage and modern. I spotted a couple of items from my collection in the new Indiana Jones movie (set in 1957), in the scene where Indy hides in a refrigerator.

You’re seeing almost all of my counter space in the above photo. I use the stove top as a prep area too. There’s some vintage Pyrex on top of the microwave. The utensil crock is contemporary Fiestaware. The thing with the white wheels is Clocky. A turquoise teakettle is on my wishlist.

Since my kitchen is so small, I’ve tried to copy some things I’ve seen in sailboat kitchens and use the space as efficiently as possible. I installed a rack (from Ikea) above the stove, where pots, measuring cups and other items hang within easy reach. Magnetic spice jars (not pictured) stick to the side of the fridge, also within easy reach.

Most of the salt & pepper shaker collection shares the wall with a few other kitschy items. My favorites are the Jimmy Carter peanuts (center shelf on the left) and Mt. St. Helens (bottom shelf on the right). I think I have a turquoise version of every type of rotary phone ever used in the US (and I have many other rotary phones in other colors).

More turquoise stuff. Top: a vintage Popeil Dial-O-Matic slicer, vintage Pyrex oval casserole dishes, original Easy-Bake Oven, salt & pepper shakers (the round ones are Fiestaware). Middle: vintage General Electric mixer (thanks Martin), vintage Pyrex bowls, ceramic dish with lid marked “Miramar of Calif 644 ©1956,” pitcher of unknown origin (thanks Shawn). Bottom: contemporary colander, vintage plastic cups & saucers, vintage Pyrex casserole dish with carrier, vintage ice bucket, calendar plates for 1972.

I’ll be writing more about my turquoise kitchenware in future posts.

Weird Gadget of the Week: The Ex Knife Set

If this voodoo doll / knife block were shaped like a woman rather than a man, there would be a huge outcry and the product would get tons of free publicity. Thankfully, that didn’t happen.

Available for $69.95 plus shipping at AsSeenOnTV.com (presumably crappy knives included).   I think I’ll pass.

Dispatch from the Mashed Potato Lab

My research into various methods of making mashed potatoes continues. An update on my findings:

Using a Crock-Pot (the ultimate slacker appliance) on the Low setting, even overnight, will not cook potatoes (or other root vegetables) completely. It just doesn’t get hot enough. However, cooking on High for around 5 hours seems to work OK. The Crock-Pot probably uses less energy than boiling potatoes on the stove top (I have an electric stove – ugh) and doesn’t heat up your kitchen as much on those hot days when you don’t feel like cooking.

I haven’t yet tried boiling potatoes in the microwave — the batches I’ve been making have been too large to fit in there.

The Yukon Gold batch was mighty tasty.

I’ve tried two methods of mashing: stand mixer vs. food mill. The mixer method thoroughly whips those taters into shape, leaving a smooth texture. I mix them with the flat beater, then the wire whip; if you like your potatoes a little lumpy, just use the flat beater. The food mill (using the coarsest disc) takes about the same amount of time, uses no electricity, and gives you a flakier texture than the mixer – similar to what you’d get using a ricer.

Cleanup: Since I don’t have a dishwasher, washing the big mixer bowl and beater parts is more of a production than washing the food mill. Hand-washing a Crock-Pot is always a pain in the ass because it’s so heavy and slippery, but cleanup after boiling potatoes in it isn’t so awful because there’s no sticky mess. (I always use a plastic liner when making something really nasty like chili in my Crock-Pot.)